Fraterculus
by icclenomi
Summary: just a little ficcy about Sam and Cam- as if Cameron had been brought up with Sam... spoilers up to Avalon.


I don't own Stargate- or by extension, any of the characters- I did find what looked like 2 Goa'uld control crystals, but they were broken, so any chance of extracting data is gone. right... anyway, yeah- story!

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Sam was fifteen when her parents brought the kid home. He was a skinny little thing who looked so utterly miserable it pulled at her heartstrings, he just looked so lost, sitting on the sofa with his little suitcase next to him, a photo firmly grasped in his hands. She, for a fleeting moment, considered talking to him, see what was wrong, but decided against it- instead going into the kitchen to find her father.

"Dad, why is the kid here?"

"Samantha, you are aware of the accident which claimed Captain Mitchell's life last week?" She nodded; every family on base knew about it, it was hard to miss the explosion of the experimental craft's engine which occurred moments after take off. The pilot was well liked on base, Sam had only met him the once herself. She would have been around six years old and she had wondered across the base and found herself to be quite lost, she had latched onto him when she caught sight of a small brown bear swinging from his hand- that had to mean he would be nice! Sam found herself smiling sadly at the memory. "Early this morning… Mrs. Mitchell, she… wasn't coping with her husband's death very well, and she… was found this morning- she passed away, we're not entirely sure how at present- but Cameron needs a home. We have a spare room, I knew the captain quite well- he thought the world of his little boy; he's a great kid. I just want to know that he's got a good home, so he's going to live with us, Sam."

Sam, again, nodded. She felt for the kid- how he must be feeling she couldn't imagine. Turning back towards the living room she didn't know how to even begin to talk to this kid, what could you really say? I'm sorry? This totally blows? Feeling horrible, she made her way up to her bedroom and tried not to think about the sad little boy sitting in the room below her.

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"It doesn't matter where they are or what it is they're doing. It's SG-1 and we're going to cover their asses. ETA is nine minutes. Expect the enemy to throw everything they have at us. All right, saddle up, folks!" Cameron Mitchell pulled on his helmet as he sat down behind the controls of the F 302 he'd been piloting for the past few months. He wasn't letting a single Al'kesh touch SG1, not a chance in hell.

"Head's up, Blue Leader. This is Carter. We have another bandit, incoming."

"I see it, Major."

He knew he was in trouble- he knew it a half hour before they got the call to assemble. Somehow… he just knew he wouldn't walk away from today. Regardless, he was going to take as many of Anubis' Jaffa with him as was humanly possible. He knew Banks was dead, he knew he'd been hit and that he was leaving a trail of thick black smoke on his ass- but he wasn't going down, not yet. He swept around once more, picking off Anubis' fleet in a chain, only stopping when his flight controls completely jammed, his craft veering heavily out of control. However, he didn't properly panic until the moment came when-

"Eject! Eject! Dammit, ejection failed! Mayday! Mayday! We are going in! Repeat, we are going in!"

The ground came rushing toward him in a cloud of white until white shattered away into a fuzzy grey. He didn't know how long he was alone in the frozen hell, he forced himself to stay conscious until he knew for certain that the battle was won- SG1 had done it, and he found himself succumbing to a numb darkness.

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It had been two weeks, and still she hadn't heard him speak. Cameron spent most of his time sitting out of the way, out of sight, too quiet to be the child her father had been telling her about for the past fortnight. Finally she had enough. Making a split second decision, she pulled herself away from her studies and knocked on Cameron's door, peering into the room. When the boy looked up in her direction she told him to grab his coat.

"Come on, Cameron- I'm taking you out. Lunch- come on." She didn't wait to see if he moved, instead she went to collect her own jacket and her purse. With the little she had seen Cameron do during the time he'd been living with them, she found herself surprised to see him waiting for her by the door. "Ready?"

He nodded and followed her out of the door. Before long they found themselves in a nearby diner, making quick work of a couple of cheeseburgers and fries. When it happened, Sam didn't quite believe it, it seemed to come out of nowhere.

"Do you think it's crazy that I wanna be a pilot?"

"What?" The boy hadn't even looked up, stabbing a French fry into the small pile of ketchup on his plate. "I gotta be crazy, right? I mean, I saw what happened to my dad- but I still wanna fly- but that's crazy." Sam quickly recovered to answer,

"No, Cameron." She said, "Kid, that's not crazy at all- don't think that."

"I'm not dumb, I'm not a little kid- I know that they're dead. No one wants to talk about them- its like they think if they don't talk about them then I won't think about it- that I won't remember Dad's plane blowing up in the sky or- or finding mom lying on the floor. Like everything can be like its just normal, like I don't live in a strange new house, that I'm not an orphan- that I'm not, that I'm not just taking up e'ryone's time an' eatin' their food an'- like, like they ain't, that they're not-" As Cameron's outburst became more hysterical, Sam moved around the table to sweep him up into a tight embrace, feeling the trembles moving through his body.

"Shh- it's gonna be okay, okay?"

"Just 'cause I- just 'cause I didn't talk aboudit- it don't mean that I, that I didn't wanna-" he hiccupped.

"I know, kid- I know." Sam didn't realize that she too was crying until she tasted salt on her lips as she spoke aloud to him.

"I miss them real bad, why'd they haveta...?"

"I don't know, kid.-" Cameron pulled away slightly to look into her face, and she could see the blotchy redness that had overcome his freckled features.

"They was good people; we went to church, we followed the rules, they never did anything wrong." He looked down as he sniffed.

"Sometimes…" she lowered herself so she was once again face to face with him. "Sometimes, kid- bad stuff happens to good people- there's not always a visible reason."

"I told him to go away." Cameron pressed on. "He just wanted to play ball with me before he went to work, and I didn't wanna and I told him to go away and then-" Sam was suddenly stern.

"Hey. Don't you dare do that to yourself. It was an accident, nothing more- you understand?" he nodded and suddenly a small grin worked its way onto his face. "What?"

"You're kinda kneeling in ketchup."

"wh…" she somehow couldn't find herself to get mad at herself when she heard his laugh.

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After they destroyed the fleet and Jack was put in status, the rest of SG1 were beamed onto the Prometheus where they met up with a beaming General Hammond. They asked to see the 302 pilots to thank them in person for their excellent support, and so they made their way to McMurdo. Looking around they saw only four pilots- none of them the man Samantha was looking for.

"Where's Mitchell? Cameron; where is he?" The pilots didn't want to look at Major Carter, no one wanted to be the one to tell her-

"We don't know. We heard a mayday before the big finale- but he's been radio silent since. There's search teams out there looking for the rest of our guys but…"

"But what?"

"He'd been hit pretty bad long before he went down- his ejection failed and… its just at those speeds-"

"Don't even think it, Captain."

"Yes, ma'am." The radios jumped into life as a sudden transmission broke through, barking urgent requests for extraction tools and medical facilities to be prepared for the quad leader. SG1, as tired as they were, insisted on being the ones who delivered the necessary supplies. Upon arriving at the specified co—ordinates, Sam felt her stomach jump up into the her chest- of course she had known the implications when the supply requests were made- but it couldn't really prepare her to see him looking so helpless. She felt Daniel pull her into a hug, she quickly shrugged him off, moving past the zipped body bag nearby the craft- she climbed into the back and spoke comforting words to her foster brother for the full five hours it took to extract him safely.

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"I can't do this anymore." Sam hated how low Cameron fell when things went wrong; he was the guy who was always smiling, his last birthday he had actually bounced- he bounced! Yet, when things went wrong for Cameron… they just piled themselves high then buried him in a seemingly endless sea of self doubt.

"Cam-"

"I killed refugees-"

"It wasn't your fault. I've read the report, Cam- there was no way you could have-"

"But I cau-"

"Cam, if you knew some of the crap I've caused…"

"Then you'd have to kill me 'cause I don't have clearance that high- and I shouldn't." Cameron buried his face in his arms, his legs pulled close to his body. "I… don't think I can get behind those controls again- I don't… it's a responsibility I proved I really don't deserve."

"Do you remember the first time you talked to me? You remember what the first thing you asked me?"

"Can you pass the ketchup?" Sam almost smiled, better- if only slightly.

"No, kid, you said 'Am I crazy to want to be a pilot.', you near gave me a heart attack- nothing for two weeks and then this really blunt question. Remember, that even though you thought it was insane- and all those years you thought you couldn't do it- kid, you turned out to be one of the best damned pilots this air force has seen! You are, give yourself some credit- sometimes bad things-"

"-Happen to good people, yeah, I know. But there is a reason for their deaths- me."

"I wasn't talking about the refugees. You're a victim too- you were given misinformation and then left with the fallout- it is not your fault. Do not make me call Jack out here to talk to you."

"Fine, fine- but I still have to live with it."

"I know you do, kid."

"Sam."

"Yeah?"

"I ain't a kid anymore."

"You are to me."

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He couldn't hold the tears in. He tried his best, his very best, to hold them in- but the thought that he may not ever walk again terrified him beyond anything else he'd ever experienced in his life. The worst part about this was knowing that he couldn't do anything- damnit, he couldn't even raise his hand to clean his damned face! Instead, he had to let Sam wipe the tears away while Daniel watched on with a look of such pity on his face- he wanted to shout, he wanted to tear the place apart- he didn't want any pity, no pity. Instead, he lay in his uncomfortable hospital bed, blinking at the doctors and trying so hard not to think about the tubes running in and around his body. He knew he was booked in for several rounds of surgeries, several of which were within the next few days, and he was going crazy. Jack had told him- nay, promised him, that should he get himself better- he could have any assignment he wanted. However, at the moment he couldn't see any tunnels of light, no hope. The way was blocked and he couldn't move to destroy it, or even make a sizable dent. Oh yes, Cameron Mitchell was feeling sorry for himself, that much was for certain. Any why shouldn't he? If anyone had a right to feel sorry for himself, it was Cameron Mitchell. However, he knew if Sam was around- if anyone was around- they would try to get him to stop- and he didn't want to either fold to them or pull anyone down with him. If recent events were any indication, Sam was sure to give up her career to help him- to play babysitter once more- and he wouldn't have that. No way, no how was he going to be responsible for that.

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"What?" One day he's dying of cancer, now he isn't- but I won't be able to see him- apart from sometimes he'll get in contact… "What's goin' on? There's something y'aren't telling me!"

"Hey, kid, it's not like-"

"No! Everyone's in on it! Everybody knows what's going on but me- I just wanna know why I can't see my dad- I know there's a lot you can't tell me about your jobs, I get that, but why-"

"I'm sorry, Cameron, if it were up-"

"Save it. Forget it- forget I asked, forget everything…" Cameron trailed off as he left the room, he knew that whatever was going on involved them all, he knew he shouldn't hold it against them, but it was just so damned hard not to.

"You realize what just happened there…" Same turned to the others once he was out of earshot. Jacob nodded.

"He sees the fourth parent, he thought he'd lost, willingly chose to leave him."

"But he'll get past it- the kid's strong-"

"Jack, you don't see what he's like when he thinks no one can see him- when he's alone. He's strong because he's had a hell of a time- he isn't going to understand Dad just disappearing. He's seen three parents die- suddenly. He was just coming to terms with the cancer, but now…" Daniel and Jacob nodded their agreement.

"Cameron Mitchell has proven himself to be a worthy soldier, has he not?"

"He's a damned good pilot."

"And he is trustworthy."

"Of course, Teal'c-"

"I suggest a request should be made on his behalf for him to be granted security clearance."

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"Get out- I don't want any company." Cam didn't look at her as he spoke, instead staring blankly at the ceiling.

"Cam, you don't have to-"

"Just go."

"No." Cameron didn't respond. "Aren't you going to snap at me again? The silent treatment? Now I know that won't last, you've been fighting to speak for over a week. You won't talk? Fine; I'll just sit here 'til you do."

"Why won't you just leave me alone?"

"Because I don't want to, and I don't think you really want me to either."

"I told ya, didn't I?" Sam knew better than to listen to him when he got like this, she knew she'd only have to wait it out. "Go out or something, will ya? You've been here long before I woke up- you know I know it's true."

"I'll leave on one condition."

"Name it."

"You don't give up. The moment you give up and accept your fate is the very same moment you guarantee it."

"Sam, you heard the doc…"

"Hey- your legs are gonna heal and your body, you will regain your strength and you're going to walk. Then you're going to have any assignment you want- any assignment."

"Thought you said one condition…" Sam smiled, this was the right path.

"It's all the same thing- you don't give up and you can achieve all of that, it won't be easy, but you'll do it. I know you, kid." She expected him to react to the nickname, but instead he looked deep in thought. "Spit it out."

"D'ya think I could… I mean, would they let me… join SG1, do you think?" A number of thoughts raced through Samantha Carter's head upon those words- that's so sweet, he seemed embaressed to ask, does he really respect us that much? Would he cope on offworld missions? Will his body cope- he'll have healed but he'd surely never be back to his full strength, would he? How many times have you sat besides your teammate's hospital bed, not knowing if they'd wake up- could you do that again with Cameron? 'What ifs' streamed through her mind at a thousand miles an hour, each scenario getting worse and worse until she had the image of him sitting dejected in a wheelchair, his spirit completely gone, and she knew it had to be done.

"If that's what you wanna happen, I'm sure it can be done if you're up to scratch physically- you do know what that'd mean though?"

"Sure, endless months of torture- physical therapy – but if I knew that I could…" Sam knew from that point that he would accept nothing less- not now it was in his head. "Out you go, Sam- get some decent food, eat some for me."

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For now, this is the end- I can't think how to continue it, and this didn't see like too bad a place to end… if I can come up with more I'll post it, but no promises…


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